An open letter to myself

Dear Ellie,

You have two ears and one mouth. Use them accordingly. You don’t always need to be talking in order to be noticed. Seriously, your teachers are really going to appreciate it. 

Stop pleasing others at the cost of your own satisfaction. Tell them they got your order wrong. The person working will not hate you, they will not think less of you, they do not know you. No, not everyone will always be polite in return, but it’s not a personal attack, they’re just having a bad day.

If no one has called you to play outside, get off the couch and go for a bike ride on your own. You won’t miss out on TV considering you have watched this rerun of Dave the Barbarian so many times that you’re saying the lines ahead of time.

Yes that comment you just overheard was about your weight. No, you are not any less of a person. You want to cuss them out, but I know you’re not going to. Continue being patient.

Do your homework. Not so that you don’t get in trouble, but rather so that you develop the habit. I know school is really boring at the moment, but it will get difficult eventually and you will thank me for this advice.

Put down the camera and take a look around you. You can get images of the Arc Du Triomphe on google, but you can’t find memories online. Just enjoy life for what it is and stop taking photos.

It’s okay to recognize flaws in your parents. They are humans just like everybody else. Some days they might be short on patience but at the end of the day they will never be short on love. Remember that.

Educate yourself on white privilege and understand what it means. Being singled out as one of only 3 white kids in your grade may make you feel a little uncomfortable and outcast, but beyond those 70 students, the world is very different. Do not refer to yourself as a minority, you sound like an idiot.

Boys are cool but honestly you’re so much cooler. They don’t like you now for superficial reasons, but believe me you should be grateful. Plus, now you don’t have to worry about anyone bringing up embarrassing stories about when that guy asked you out in grade 8 and it lasted for 2 weeks. You were way too sophisticated for any of that nonsense that anyways.

Don’t be embarrassed about getting a gym membership. Everyone is going to hop on that train in about 5 years, you’ll be glad you started to familiarize yourself so early.

Stop comparing yourself to every girl around you. Stop thinking she is lucky for the way that she looks because you don’t know what else is going on in her life. Spoiler alert: you will have some of the crappiest days while looking both pretty and thin.

Ask your sister how her day was. She may or may not answer sarcastically, but ask anyways.

Hug your dad. He works too often and will rarely ask for one, but he loves you and would really appreciate a hug.

Help your mom. Once you start living on your own you will realize how much energy it takes to do everything that she does in a day. Show her your appreciation more often.

And finally, love yourself. It’s going to take a lot of work to build up any sort of self esteem but it will be worth it. All it takes is realizing that the world isn’t out to get you and that you are capable of controlling your life satisfaction.

Sincerely,

Your older and still not so wise Self

2 Comments Add yours

  1. monicakirathi says:

    So powerful. I love it. I love it. I love it.

    Like

  2. monicakirathi says:

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    Like

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